The Vengeful Cynic

2004-01-06T23:43:00.000-06:00

2004-01-05T23:43:00.000-06:00

I'm way too lazy to go find a disturbed link. Here's to hoping that this is the last post on the old and nasty blogger system!

Alright, here are two joke threads that I was passed.

Days Until I See Anna: 2
Days Since I Saw Anna: 20

2004-01-04T15:32:00.000-06:00

Let's put it this way... we're very close to getting off of blogger!

Eric: "So were you the honorable student who didn't look at the board for the answers?"
Jake: "Why?"

Ardith: "Why am I the odd one out?"

Disturbed Links of the Day: Where verylazy.com redirects to
Days Until I See Anna: 3
Days Since I Saw Anna: 19

2004-01-04T00:17:00.000-06:00

"Why do you need a book on wench management? Why, you ask, is it so hard to get females to do what they're told when they have such an easy time manipulating men? The trick is all in how we understand the world.

You see, men tend to be logical and women tend to be emotional. That said, we men have one very powerful emotion that tends to get us in a lot of trouble and emotionally-saavy women tend to use this to their advantage. Thus, we're trapped by an emotion that we can hardly manage, much less control.

On the other hand, you're a man, just trying to get a wench to do what she's supposed to. Problem being, you;re approaching the situation from logic and women have no secret logic receptor that overrides their emotions. In fact, playing to logic tends to confuse the issue and create a whole new set of vague and ambiguous emotions..."

That might be the beginning... or it might not. We'll see.

Disturbed Links of the Day: Tricksy Surveys
Days Until I See Anna: 4
Days Since I Saw Anna: 18

2004-01-03T00:11:00.000-06:00

So yeah, today I started writing again. It's been a long time since I've written anything of a respectable length that I didn't have to, and most of that unnecessary writing turned out to be trash. It seems like I can never get past the catharsis stage to the point where I just have quality ideas and content to generate. We'll see if this goes any differently.

Disturbed Links of the Day: TibFib's Homepage
Days Until I See Anna: 5
Days Since I Saw Anna: 17

2004-01-02T13:01:00.000-06:00

Before reading this, I would have you note that this is probably the rough draft and there are some places where it needs help and a lot of linking action. That said, feel free to comment on things that you feel I've left out... and I'll probably toss them in there. In fact, I encourage criticism, nit-picking and error-hunting.

2003: A year in review from the perspective of The Vengeful Cynic

January 2003
This month sees the return of the Cynic and all other good LU students to campus for the Spring Semester.
Cynic skips chapel.
During Missions Emphasis Week, the Cynic runs across a contingent of people from Quad 3... and takes a liking to them.
Cynic and Shem spend a lot of time talking down at Q3.
The Cynic starts blogging.
Cynic and Wilson are enrolled in Historiography together... this is a very bad idea but nobody knows it yet.
The Cynic gets access to the electronic bulletin board associated with Contemporary Political Issues and starts assembling the framework to build a gallows to hang himself.
The Cynic vents... a lot
C-4 informs the Cynic that the age of consent in OK is 16.

February 2003
Space Shuttle Columbia burns up on re-entry over Texas; Cynic's father calls at 8am to ask questions and continues to call every half hour until phone is taken off the hook at 11am.
Cynic skips more chapel.
Cynic pulls an all-nighter down at Quad 3 with female involved... damned shame I could never get the luck to do that sort of thing with SC people.
C-4 reminds the Cynic about the age of consent in OK.
The infamous "satire" post of the Cynic goes up on the Contemporary Political Issues forum; Cynic is nearly lynched by frenzied wenches.
Frenzied wenches calm down and propose truce. This truce is the beginning of very good friendships.
The term "Happy People" comes into existance and the war against them in its current form begins.
The Cynic gets sick.
Cowboy starts blogging.
Brenton is "asked" to take down his confederate flag.
Ardith starts blogging.

March 2003
Manly Month of March.
Anna starts blogging.
Cynic drops Circuits 2; changes majors from CSE to CS and thus gains modicum of sanity.
C-4 again tells us all about the age of consent in OK.
Cynic skips chapel, yet again.
Spring break comes; Cynic's parents come down to visit and everyone else skips town.
Cynic rides with Jenny, ELH-2 girls up to Paris, TX in order to accompany Jenny back to Longview.
Parents leave town; Cynic spends week having a blast on virtually-vacant floor.
New LU Forum starts up.
Judge is stolen by ELH2 wenches; recovered.
Stitch is stolen by Bandits; held for a week.

April 2003
Cynic discovers Something Positive!
Cynic skips more chapel due to this discovery.
Bandits clean house in LSM Pie Auction to send money to LU summer missions.
Admissions Nazis kick Cynic out of his own table at Saga.
Wilson discovers 10 minute rule printed in Faculty/Staff Handbook.
Cowboy decides he's not coming back to LU.
Cynic (and rest of America) submits taxes.
International SARS outbreak hits national news.
Randy's sister dies in a horrible accident; Randy starts blogging.
Cynic, Gecko, Dunny, Anna decide to stay on campus for the summer... Stan and Caleb stick around for a while.
Spring Semester ends with finals
Cynic does lots chapel make-ups due to all of that skipping; vows to skip less chapel.

May 2003
Cynic moves to the John Thomas Hall for summer residency; decides it sucks.
Gecko wanders Texas; gets corrective eye surgery.
Fire alarms in John Thomas Hall go off... a lot.
Stan leaves to go home.
Cynic starts going to St. Mike's.
Wilson starts blogging.
Moore starts blogging.
Tom Elliot vists East Texas for Jordan Groody's wedding.
Matrix Reloaded comes out; fails to live up to expectations
Cynic declares war on NOW.
Gadzooks decides to go to an all-female store with a horrid ad campaign.
Cynic starts working at Physical Plant; discovers a whole new definition of slacking.
Cynic gets sick of school; skips town to see little brother graduate.
Anna starts taking a programming class; Cynic starts helping.

June 2003
Cynic returns to school; realizes how much working for Phys. Plant sucks.
Ardith tries to recruit thugs to mess with Cynic; fails miserably.
Fire alarm in John goes off more.
Cynic, Gecko, Anna start visiting "high places" on campus.
Cynic starts playing on Gaia; flaming morons.
Cynic, Scholl, Gecko move to apartments; get out of shitty dorm with much effort.
Cynic upgrades computer.
Cynic catches knife in the back from Anna and Gecko.
Linear Algebra finishes.
Wilson skips the country.
Cynic helps Anna with more programs.
Cynic, Anna, summer residents go to Texas Rangers game; have much fun.
Anna throws up on Cynic.

July 2003
Dunny's car is broken into.
Cynic gets a tetanus shot; doesn't die.
Cynic takes up Wench Management Consulting.
Cynic picks up a wench of his own.
Cynic goes home for two weeks to placate parents.
Cynic and crew play demolition at Perkins
NFL fines Detroit Lions for not interviewing minority coach in hiring process.
Jenny came to visit Cynic in Ohio; they travel the city, loot and pillage.

August 2003
Julie starts commenting on my blog
Crew nearly gets kicked out of Perkins.
Cynic moves back up to Tyler
Cynic gets hired at IT.
Cynic goes with Anna to Lake City to pick up car.
Stu gets fired from IMPACT.
3rd Annual Texas Bigfoot Conference is held.
Wilson returns to school; leaves; comes back again.
The SC is back at school.
The SC church-visitation squad starts up; visits Pine Crest.
Notorious "Demon Bird Sermon" is preached.

September 2003
Cynic and crew visit "El Cancun" get food poisoning; Wilson skips to go to Marketing dinner.
Infamous Yellow Jacket with no back page is printed.
Only Longview Symphony of the semester occurs.
Moore picks up a wench in a record low amount of time.
Wheeler starts blogging.
Wilson discovers Oral Roberts.
Moore contributes Markov Chain generator to cause; runs Leviticus through it.

October 2003
Cynic discovers repository of poison oak; has hives breakout on hands as a result
Martinez sends out more hillarious bible study emails.
Morgan and parents come into town; go to IHOP with the SC and crew.
Cynic and Anna stop church shopping; stay at Saint Mike's.
The Gallery starts causing trouble in their own right.
Cynic starts taking WMD donations.
Fall break happens; crew sticks in town and watches movies and plays board games.
Cynic drives to and from Dallas twice on the business of getting Toad to/from DFW airport.
Gallagher starts blogging.
Scott starts blogging.
Fall-fest week insanity begins.

November 2003
Fall-fest banquet happens; Cynic, Anna, Moore, Sharon all go.
Matrix: Revolutions shows, lives down to low expectations and exceeds them
My brother Geoff's good friend Jamie dies in horrible accident.
Thanksgiving comes; Cynic and Anna go to Dr. Olson's house
Cynic does next to nothing over Thanksgiving break
Master and Commander comes out and doesn't suck; balance is restored to the Force

December 2003
The Cynic has a birthday; is taken to dinner by the SC crew and has a blast.
Cynic buys new speakers with birthday money; the music lives again!
Hell week and finals week hit LeTourneau; many die.
The first semester ever where the Cynic is neither chapel deficient nor doing make-ups ends; Cynic is proud.
Anna comes down with mono; goes home to Colorado.
Everyone leaves to go home; Cynic sadly drags himself home to Ohio.
Lord of the Rings: Return of the King hit theaters; Cynic remembers why movie theaters in Cincinnati are so much better than those in Longview.
Several days later, Ardith and Anna manage to see RotK near their respective podunk towns.
Christmas happens; people give gifts, are happy. Cynic is sick.
Wheeler finally sees RotK; rest of SC mocks him.
Terror level is raised to Orange; promises to be a pain in the ass to all travellers.
Cynic reads... a lot.
Cynic ends the year on the phone with Anna, and is generally pleased with how this year has gone

2004-01-02T01:30:00.000-06:00

I've been sitting here, toying with a "Year in Review" post. I'm up to April. Hopefully I can publish it tomorrow.

Disturbed Links of the Day: 2003 Google Zeitgeist
Days Until I See Anna: 6
Days Since I Saw Anna: 16

2004-01-01T14:24:00.000-06:00

The Cynic Will Exact Vengeance Upon: Blogger

That's the last post you eat, you stupid blogging system!

2004-01-01T01:56:00.000-06:00

Here's to the New Year:

If it works, let us be wise enough to not change it...
and if it doesn't, let us be brave enough to try something different.
Let us keep those friends near who are dear to us,
while at the same time making new ones and drawing old ones closer.
Let us have temperance to moderate ourselves,
and wisdom to know when the time has come to abandon moderation.
Let us have the time to do everything that needs it,
and the insight to put off or drop those things that don't need to be done.
Let us see life in the reality of what it is,
and yet have the courage to hope for what it could be.
Finally, let us live in the Hope of our Saviour and Lord,
by whom, with whom, and in whom is our best and only chance at a meaningful year.

2003-12-31T19:46:00.000-06:00

Happy New Year all. Don't have much time, so the disturbed link kinda sucks. Or maybe not... But first, 101 ways to fix the 'net. And now, the endcap, because I am running a bit late to get somewhere.

Disturbed Links of the Day: Woman Ticketed for Indecent Exposure (clean)
Days Until I See Anna: 7
Days Since I Saw Anna: 15

2003-12-30T02:17:00.000-06:00

Books are expensive. I read books fast. Thus, reading is an exceptionally expensive hobby for me. And thusly, I hit used book stores and sales when I can. Not to mention libraries. So, today I hit Half-Price Books and I hope to be hitting ebay tonight to pick up some more books. Fortunately, it looks like I'll have enough books to take me, assuming I try to avoid reading too many more of them.

These days have been fairly rough as far as coming to grips with my relation with God. It would seem like He is really trying to leverage me into a position where I'm listening and I have a hard time being in that position for any length of time. That said, I am working and praying that I will come to learn what He would teach me and, in time, come to be a better student.

Disturbed Links of the Day:
Top 10 Banned Ads for the Year
Street Mattress

Days Until I See Anna: 8
Days Since I Saw Anna: 14

2003-12-30T02:01:00.000-06:00

I've never been a person with a lot of faith. I guess it comes from the fact that I'm a very analytical, logical and straightforward person who has a hard time with what he can't see. Combine this with the fact that I am a cynic, any you come up with a real issue.

As much trouble as I have with general faith, it doesn't hold a candle to the problems I have in trusting in God's goodness. God works for our overall good... and that's fine, except that for all I know, that means another bullet in the ass tomorrow and the day after, and the day after, and so on. And when that bullet in the ass really takes the wind out of you, you have a hard time asking for God to bless you, knowing how well the last "blessing" went.

I guess, in the end it comes down to this: life sucks right now. And I keep praying that it'll get better sooner than later. But right now, it just keeps getting worse. And I guess I just have to have faith that in the end, this misery and despair won't break me. Let's hopethat it doesn't...

2003-12-30T00:42:00.000-06:00

So yeah, I went to a funeral visitation for my high school youth pastor's mom. It was mostly just to support him as I never had even met his mom, but I guess that visitation just prompted me to do a lot of thinking about life in general. Namely, how much time are we wasting in life, throwing it away on stuff that doesn't matter at all? I would assert that we need to spend more time putting life into perspective so that we don't waste time on the stuff that doesn't matter.

Disturbed Link of the Day: Bizarre News Year in Review (thanks Wilson)
Days Until I See Anna: 9
Days Since I Saw Anna: 13

2003-12-29T15:11:00.000-06:00

Commenting is down... again. Between Blogger and Enetation, it's a miracle that I manage to get this thing to work at all. I guess it goes without saying that I need to get real hosting and MT.

Yet again I am reminded of just what a bizarre and eclectic fellow I really am. Thoughts for today:

You know, the restaurant industry in general is very poorly run and since my mind is on coffee shops of late, we will focus there. You need to understand your target demographic. If you are looking for teens and yuppies who want to feel a bit snobby, the best way to do this is NOT to monopolize half of your store with gaudy-looking crap for sale with your logo on it. The key here is a layed-back atmoshpere: mellow and subdued are the key. Kill the lighting, figure out a way to get rid of that menu monstrousity on the wall behind you, and get rid of the metallic art-deco furniture in favor of padded chairs and wooden tables. Also try to find some classy people to work at your store. If you're going to charge $5 for coffee, make it look like the place is worth it. Another thing, get some wireless internet and some subtle power outlets by the tables for laptops. Maybe even a terminal or two in an out-of-the-way spot. Don't charge for the internet (maybe charge for use of the computer) and watch the nerds flock. And they'll be much more likely to buy more coffee if you keep them sticking around.

Why is it so hard to find the places that need workers? I was out helping my little brother find a job today and we drove by all manner of stores and restaurants, grabbing applications. And literally 95% of the places that were hiring had no indicator of it. There has to be a better way for this. It's not like the companies don't want employees and it's not like the people who are in need of work don't want to get a job... but there is really no better way of a teenager finding a job then walking into a place cold and asking for an application. What gives with that?

Now that I'm home and away from the people I want to be around and the mental engagement of school, I finally get my head to clear and start thinking straight again. I mean, I haven't had this much spare mental energy since about week 2 of the semester. Why is it that we never have the time or resources to get things done when we're all at school together and it's only all by ourselves that we start getting really creative? And why is it that I forget all of the truly interesting thoughts somewhere between the car and the computer? I need to get something to record my brain waves, because I even have thoughts slip my mind in the several seconds it takes to fish the notepad and pen out of my pocket. Sad, isn't it?

I am very bad at trying to resist reading the books that I buy. Granted, I also borrow a lot of books from my friends to keep me in the money, but since I've been home I've read: Dragons of Autumn Twilight, Dragons of Winter Night, Dragons of Spring Dawning, The Case for Israel, The DaVinci Code, Angels and Demons, Slander, Treason, Bias, Why I am not a Muslim, Unveiling Islam. I'm currently working my way through the Space Trilogy and then I'll probably read some other stuff. Bear in mind that I've read a lot of these before, but one makes due with what one must.

2003-12-29T01:23:00.000-06:00

Wow... a very long day with a lot of thinking. Not a lot of conclusions yet, give me some time for that.

Disturbed Link of the Day: Freaking Canadians!
Days Until I See Anna: 10
Days Since I Saw Anna: 12

2003-12-28T01:38:00.000-06:00

Well, that was an interesting day. Nice and uneventful.

You will note that I am now posting the estimated number of days until I see the Wench. Granted, it's not a precise estimate yet (still doesn't account for several favors, but it's good enough for now.)

And now I'm tired and shall go to sleep...

Disturbed Link of the Day: The Chuck E. Cheese To Keep Your Kids Away From
Days Until I See Anna: 11
Days Since I Saw Anna: 11

2003-12-27T15:03:00.000-06:00

Rather interesting article about Dr. James Fowler's Stages of Faith that I found as I was browsing around today. It discusses the psychology of human development as it relates to growth of religious faith.

I found this particular paragraph very fascinating:

The fourth stage is known as Individuative-Reflective. This is primarily a stage of angst and struggle, in which one must face difficult questions regarding identity and belief. Those that pass into stage four usually do so in their mid-thirties to early forties. At this time, the personality gradually detaches from the defining group from which it formerly drew its identity. The person is aware of him or herself as an individual and must--perhaps for the first time--take personal responsibility for his/her beliefs and feelings. This is a stage of de-mythologizing, where what was once unquestioned is now subjected to critical scrutiny. Stage four is heavily existential, where nothing is certain but one's own existence, and disillusionment reigns. This stage is not a comfortable place to be and, although it can last for a long time, those who stay in it do so in danger of becoming bitter, suspicious characters who trust nothing and no one. But most, after entering this stage, sense that not only is the world far more complex than his or her stage three mentality would allow for, it is still more complex and numinous than the agnostic rationality of stage four allows.

It's one of those things that a lot of people who have moved around will tell you. You very quickly come to terms with who you are and what you believe, because you can't be identified by your surroundings, your church or your friends. And quite frankly, when you're moving, you tend to get into a hell of a lot of fights with your family (at least mine always did) under the pressure of all of that stress.

Tim and I were talking yesterday, about when I moved back to the Cincinnati area. You see, Tim and I have known each other since I was in 3rd grade. But in the middle of my 4th-grade year, I moved away to New York. Now, for whatever reason (probably that our parents were also good friends) we stayed in touch and talked once every week or so for most of the next 4 years or so and we went on vacation together twice and we visited each other over summers and stuff.

So, my family moved back to the area my freshman year in high school. But Tim noticed something about his best friend - his attitude had changed from a generally genial and up-for-anything kind of guy to a fairly dark, cynical and pessimistic fellow. Granted, these attributes hadn't set in instantly, but they had been there and this move probably acted as an intensifying factor. Tim was really kind of shocked about this and wondered what had happened to me. It was one of those things that I had moved on a bit, and the place I had moved on to was not a very inviting one. Granted, over time I mellowed out quite a bit and retreated back from the edge of this abyss of unbridled negativity... but the mellowing has been a long, slow process.

So I guess the moral of the story is that moving is rough and it does trippy things to people and also that even though this dark night of the soul seems to be an unending pit of despair, it isn't the end. The trick is to get through this part and emerge into the Conjuctive stage.

2003-12-27T13:19:00.000-06:00

I Belong in Fight Club!

What movie Do you Belong in?(many different outcomes!)
brought to you by Quizilla

Freakishly close on some points... way out there on others. All in all, a good quiz.

Oh, and see the comic below! You'd best believe that there will be mass nerd rioting if our demands aren't met!

2003-12-27T01:20:00.000-06:00

Here's something that especially Moore and Ardith should appreciate:

You know how some days things are going well and you can do nothing wrong? Today was one of those days that nothing that I did went right. Well... not everything, just anything related to fixing this one computer.

So Tim's dad has a computer that he uses for work. Thusly, when he got it, he wanted to buy it OEM and thus have a warantee and the whole mess (he owns his own business.) So this is about the summer before my Senior year in HS. Now, 3 years later, it sucks. He tries to play newer games, and the on-board video overheats and kills itself. So he comes to us, complaining about his computer restarting itself and making funny noises (way too much dust in there, starts to make bearings in fans creak.)

This was several days ago... we took things apart, used compressed air to dust them, and went and bought a new PCI video card (no AGP port, onboard video) - an ATI 9000 PCI. That, along with a fresh format/reinstall for the first time in 3 years seemed to fix things. But apparently, there were issues (it's a 3-year-old computer, what do you expect?) So, today we were going to transplant a motherboard, processor and RAM to fix things.

Tim just "happens" (as many good nerds do) to have an Intel board and a corresponding Celeron 2.2 Ghz sitting around for a rainy day overclocking project. And since Tim's dad is willing to buy them off of him, we go off and get a 256 stick of PC2100 RAM to get the stupid thing up and running and decide to wait and see if it needs anything more for the tasks it handles. Bear in mind that up until this point the project has gone fairly well and taken only a moderate amount of time considering the tasks undertaken.

After a bit of other token shopping, Tim and I rolled back to his house and got started on the whole business of rectifying matters. We got about 3 minutes of deconstruction in when I noted, "Tim, you didn't tell me this IBM was an Athlon!" "So?" "It's OEM Tim, $10 says this power supply hasn't got Intel P4 support." What? And thus, after being at Tim's for about 5 minutes, we recessed to go get a new power supply of the modern variety. Closest place was CompUSA, so we ran there and back.

Now, we take old power supply out. It is at this point that I note that the new power supply is about 2 inches longer than the old. My rapid-fire and increasingly-creative cursing soon drew Tim's attention and he joined in with a few choice epithets. Fortunately, Tim had another computer that he had bought off of a friend's family for $20 a month or 6 back that he hadn't bothered to strip down for parts yet. So he ran to get this and I spent the next 10 minutes trying to figure out this particular variety of Compaq OEM case. After opening this case we noted another essential thing: this case had at least .25 inches of dust on everything. If not more. And we had just used the last can of compressed air up on Craig's (tim's dad hates being referred to by "mister") computer...

So off to RadioShack, which is only 5 minutes versus 15 but has compressed air for $6 a can. Tightwad, overpriced bastards and their $6 can of compressed air... But we were now 20 minutes from CompUSA and wanted to get back, so we bought their compressed air and went back. We then dragged the case outside and blasted all of the dust off of it (used up the entire can) and went back in to strip the thing. But when the dust settled, we found another interesting dilemma: this power supply had been special-made for Compaq and was a mirror image of every other power supply, thus the case's rear cut-out had the plug on the wrong side, and it even lined up wrong flipped.

However, at this point rage set in and it was time to stop buying new shit and start making things happen. First up: saber-saw the hole to the size we need it. And finding said saw takes us up to the Finding Nemo interlude with Tim's family, complete with steak dinner. After dinner, we located said saw and carved the hole. After some filing and the arrival of our buddy Dan, it was time to finally start mounting components. So with a bit of coaxing, the power supply went into it's newly-carved position and all was well. Now time to mount the motherboard. Oops, the little aluminum cover won't fit on quite. Just a tad too snug a fit. Not really worth mentioning except that Tim managed to slice his finger open in this process and while he was gone, Dan and I filed the opening a bit and got things working right.

So Tim returns to the motherboard snugly in place, shielding installed, and the power supply still looing pretty. Next goes the RAM and then the video card (note, this mobo has an AGP slot, rendering the special hunt for the good PCI video card that took the most time on the first run a general waste.) Now to power up... ooops. OEM case with special power button wiring. "Damnit, let's test POST anyways..." I exlaimed, grabbing the front of the old case, dragging it over and connecting the power button to get it to go. Well, POST is fine... but it's beginning to look like time for a new case. More cursing ensued from the 3 of us, while I sat and wracked the brain for a solution. And then Dan found it... because this OEM button rack actually just had a power button and two LED's, all on one strip. And it just so happened that the power switch was the last two pins on one end of this little connector and we could connect it to the mobo if we did it right. And thus, Dan saved the case.

After that, I finally got things back in order and started bossing people around, espcially after one of my two flunkies tried to tell me that jumpers and master/slave don't matter and they could just connect things up. Prompt smacks and beatings removed their insolence mostly, but it wasn't until I allowed them to see what would happen their way that they listened. And thusly, at 10:30 PM EST, we finally started the installation of WinXP. At this point I am noting 2 things: 1) I am sick and I am getting tired... I should go home 2) if I go home, I can talk to Anna on IM. Thus, I was driven home by the crew (the new machine is good, but the cd drive for the moment is a 4x burner b/c tim is too lazy to pull a good optical drive from his computer for the job) while they waited for the install to finish. Oh, it is now nearly 3AM EST and word has it that things still aren't done.

The sad thing is usually things go much better than this. Granted, I am the resident software specialist (if you can make cracked copies of shit work, you can make just about anything work) and not there for the software... but this day has just been cursed. Little to nothing went right, from the beginning of physical installation through to the end of software install. It was just amazing. I guess everyone has one of those days sooner or later.

Morals of the story:
1) Avoid factory-built systems
2) Custom-built OEM shit sucks
3) Know what you're getting into at the start and research this
4) Saber saws fix a lot

Disturbed Link of the Day: Online Cemetary
Days Since I Saw Anna: 10

2003-12-25T23:37:00.000-06:00

Well, Christmas was something of a day in that I was very sick for most of it. But I got a movie and some books and some clothes and some money... so life is good. Time to go shopping tomorrow to spend a lot of that stuff. Let's just hope that my health mends enough to allow for that.

Disturbed Link of the Day: Escape from Neverland
Days Since I Saw Anna: 9

2003-12-25T13:43:00.000-06:00

Something amusing that Moore sent me: The Longest Sig File Ever

And a wonderful IM conversation on stabbing that I had with Anna yesterday:

Anna: yes dear, stabbing is always the answer
Cynic: yes... stab even
Cynic: *can't type today*
Anna: ya know, if you stabbed everyone you have issues with, that takes a lot of the enjoyment you get out of arguments with them
Cynic: heh...
Cynic: oh, I wouldn't kill them
Cynic: just stab them
Cynic: classic conditioning
Cynic: "being stupid gets you stabbed"
Anna: ah
Anna: i think ignoring people works just as well.
Cynic: bah
Cynic: stabbing is so much more effective because it improves peoples' lives
Cynic: they learn to be smarter
Cynic: and all it costs is a pint or two of blood
Cynic: is that such a high price to pay?

2003-12-24T22:56:00.000-06:00

And before things here roll over midnight and it is officially Christmas, let me give you this wonderful eye candy:

Disturbed Link of the Day: The Best Page in the Universe
Days Since I Saw Anna: 8

2003-12-24T16:34:00.000-06:00

Idea stolen from Bonner:

Current Terror Level:

2003-12-24T10:20:00.000-06:00

Well, it's Christmas Eve Day in these parts and I'm figuring that since I probably won't be up tonight managing my usual 10pm-2am EST shift online, I will post now and then if I get a bit of time, I might post a little blurb later.

Things that I still have to do:
Wrap presents (alright, so I bought them all with time to spare, now they just need to be wrapped)
Go to Christmas Eve Service (6 PM I think)
Go to party at friends' house afterwards (probably stay there until 10 or 11)

Hmmm... that's a short list for today. Kind of simple really.

Things that I ought to deal with before I go back to Longview:
See friends from high school
Pirate software for Geoff's computer (so he doesn't have to shell out $1000 for software for school next semester)
Put in some work on the local effort to get a new tax increase to fund the local school district
Spend more time with my family
Enjoy the snow (that is falling as we speak)
Fix the family computer (I fixed it when I got back... it will probably need help before I leave)
Be a bum

Yeah... that should about round things out...

Disturbed Link: The New Bachelor Candidate

2003-12-23T22:53:00.000-06:00

Well... I lasted 2 weeks or so of exposure to Anna's mono and I've lasted a week here in Cincinnati... and it looks like I've finally fallen sick.

*knocks on wood*

It looks like I'm not too terribly sick and this illness should stick to the Cynic's tradition of not being sick for a long period of time and not getting too beat down for a while. Sure... I'll feel like shit for a couple of days, but I should be back up in action before the week is out. And now, I shall watch Letterman, because it entertains me much.

I love watching David Letterman after a long day of being a bum.

Some wonderful Dave quotes:
"Word has it that Saddam is now despondent... they say all he does all day is sit in his cell staring longingly at a picture of George Bush. This sounds a lot like Al Gore."

"If you're thinking of a gift for Saddam you can't go wrong with a Sharper Image Turbo Nose-Clipper."

And of course there's the top 10...

Top 10 Things that Department Store Santa Doesn't Want to Hear from the Kids:

10) Remember me? I'm the kid with the week bladder
09) You smell like supermarket gin.
08) The real Miracle on 34th St. would be if they accepted my mom's Mastercard.
07) I want a 2004 Pontiac Aztek.
06) If i don't get an X-box, I'm gonna hunt you down old man.
05) I'm Jewish.
04) I love you Kenny Rogers.
03) Frankly, I'm just here to please my parents.
02) While Im talking to you, my mom is shoplifting blouses.
01) Mom says you're my real daddy.

Well... I promised myself that I wouldn't start tracking this until I couldn't help it. So hear's the end trailer of the posts for the remainder of my stay here:

Disturbed Link of the Day: The Destruction of a Toyota Truck
Days Since I Saw Anna: 7

2003-12-22T13:24:00.000-06:00

*is laughing so hard he's crying*

I'm listening to Jim Rome and here are some things that happened in this last year:

WNBA is the most betted-upon professional sports league of its kind (Jim Rome suggests this is due to OTB.)
A kid got arrested for calling a hooker to his hospital room.
Apparently 8 games in the season, Detroit was 7.5 games out of first.
A sports writer got fired for quoting Haywood Jablome in a piece.
Some writer wants to turn the life of Evil Kenieval into a musical.
Brian Anderson thwarted a mugging in SF by running down a mugger.
JV Basketball coach in Arizona arrested for bringing strippers on school trips.
Aaron Ralston got lost hiking and chopped off his own arm with a pocket knife to get loose.
A bowling coach in Iowa was busted for kiddie-porn charges.
A German man was arrested for walking down a street with a severed head in one hand and a knife in the other.
15 players and 2 coaches in a New York school got arrested for going to a strip club.
A little-league mother told her son to attack another child during a game.
A fitness center in Denver stayed open while there was a dead body was on an exercise bike... they just moved him to the side and covered him with some towels.

Oh... and check this:

Staff-Chucks

And life wouldn't be complete without a warped link...

Disturbed Link of the Day: Odd Feminine Products Hit New Lows

2003-12-22T02:21:00.000-06:00

Well, I've seen my beautiful girlfriend off to bed. Now I must just briefly brag that my mother is one of the most open-minded and thoughtful conservative parents I know. I am very blessed to have her with a liberal arts background and a Houghton education.

I would also like to note that I have really missed my church here for these past however many months. The sermons preached are just so good that I can't believe I have been making due with less.

Lastly, I guess I'm probably either a lich or a half-fiend.

2003-12-20T23:03:00.000-06:00

So now most of my Christmas shopping is done. I did it all in one fell swoop today as I went to visit the overcrowded and poorly-designed mall with my little brother and friend Tim. After taking half an hour to get to open parking, I spent the next hour or so finding the stuff that I'd catalogued in my head over the year that I needed to get. After that, we trekked over to Tim's house where we watched the UC basketball game, had dinner, watched some of The Mummy and fiddled with his dad's computer. Now, I'm back at home, being a bum and watching TV with mom and brothers.

While I've been sitting here, I've been talking to a friend from school, and it has been decided that we can categorize everyone in the immediate SC into D&D races:

I am clearly a large dwarf
Wilson is probably Elven (for the unitiated, note that Elves only trance 4 hours a night as opposed to sleeping 8 and are typically frailer)
Anna is either Human or Half-Elven, probably Human given the proclivity for math and teaching
Ardith is clearly a gnome
Wheeler is probably an over-large halfling
Martinez is probably a human (especially with all of that obsession over knowledge(engineering) and knowledge(math))
Moore is a half-orc with an addiction to food (granted, he's an endurance man... but the one-track mind for food says half-orc)

(the gallery will get their treatment soon enough)

And just on the note of the bizarre, check this guy out. I will never be nearly as cool as he is.

And on that note, I think I'm off to go make a quiz about D&D races or something. Yes, I'm a nerd... and spending a whole day with Tim didn't help that.

2003-12-20T13:26:00.000-06:00

I can feel the process required to put the SC into power coming ever-closer to fruition.

2003-12-20T00:51:00.000-06:00

On the topic of families and dealing with them, my little brother could use your prayers.

As some of you may know, my parents split in the middle of my freshman year in college and things finally started resolving to the point that my dad moved back in over this past summer. As I was gone, this really had relatively little effect on me and my middle brother didn't seem to phased by it either. My youngest brother, however, got the raw deal on this whole thing.

By all accounts, my youngest brother and my dad have never had a great relationship. However, in the year before my dad left, he probably exhibited just about every poor leadership trait available and managed to completely alienate himself from my youngest brother. In the 5 months my father has been back, it would appear that he has neglected this relatioship or maybe even made it worse to the point where Jonny sees the 18 months my dad was gone as the best in recent memory.

There are many issues my youngest brother has with my father, including a lack of respect for him (which dad really hasn't earned back), a disdain for his hypocrisy, and a desire to see him try to fix things. For my father's part, emotions and relationships are really something that he doesn't get and he has really proved himself to be something of a coward in manning up to his past mistakes. That said, this is something that needs to be done before my little brother can begin to emotionally heal and accept his father as someone other than "that bastard."

2003-12-18T23:55:00.000-06:00

In case you'd been missing out on the disturbed linkage: What Many Girls Want For Christmas (allegedly)

Note, I claim no responsibility for the views espoused or endorsed in the link. If you followed it, that's your problem.

2003-12-18T21:49:00.000-06:00

Damnable enetation is down again and thus I don't know if my newfound time and proliferance is a good or bad thing. Failing any feedback, I will continue to post as I have inspiration and time:

Well, after the Christmas tree fun I went to go Christmas shopping at the local mall. That was all sorts of entertaining... I guess it's been a while since I've been people-watching in the mecca of teenage culture. I am here to report that while styles have changed, the mentality of the late 90's is still alive and well. It's so funny watching everyone in the mall fit into whatever cultural stereotype they aspire to. And one other note: Hot Topic is the Abercrombie & Fitch of teeny-bopper "goths."

After this wonderful experience wherein I explored the local stores and came up with gift ideas, I returned home to eat a home-cooked meal (ahh... real food) and then went to my little brother's concert. There were three band groups playing:
1) Chamber Winds (the band for people who the director can't turn down)
2) Jazz Band (for hardcore band nerds who do band 2 periods out of 4 per day)
3) Wind Ensemble (the band for people who are too good for #1)

As expected, the first group sucked... I mean they were awful. But I was close enough that I got to observe Jonny's law of saxophones in action. That being, "Saxophones are typically quiet, unless they don't know the piece in which case you can't hear them at all except when they get to the part tht they know, which they play really loudly to make up for the rest. And God forbid the saxes like the song, because then you can't hear anyone else at all."

Oh... and yes Jon is in Wind Ensemble but not Jazz Band (when you can take 4 classes/semester each year and you already take band both semesters, taking Jazz Band on top of that for a total of 50% of your education being band is a bit much.) And they were very good. Not as impressive as the Jazz Band, but I enjoyed the performance very much. Oh, and I'm now inspired to go to the high school tomorrow.

And as a non-sequitur for the last note of the evening:

If you had half an hour to prepare for an hour-long presentation on anything, what would it be and what visual aides (if any) would you use? (My answer comes tomorrow.)

2003-12-18T13:49:00.000-06:00

Amazingly enough, I am much more prolific when I have time on my hands with which to write. Isn't that just shocking?

Today my dad and I went and got a Christmas Tree. Apparently things have been fairly busy around here and when you combine that with the fact that my father isn't really all that into Christmas, you get to be about a week before Christmas and without a tree. My mom and I are quite into Christmas, but up until Tuesday I was in Texas and she is doing ESL tutoring and thus isn't available during the day. So, all that to say is the Christmasy types were busy, and the Grinch wasn't inclined to get one. My brothers? Lazy and too busy doing other things.

The whole Christmas season just gets me sentimental. Don't ask why, I don't know. It's just been that way since I was little. I like doing the whole traditional stuff and getting ready for Christmas and decorating and opening up another door on the advent calendar every day and lighting advent candles and the whole nine yards. I guess it's just that my family (dad especially) doesn't really get into that sort of thing. And when you get into a habit of not liking to do much in the way of Christmas, you just don't.

I guess that's just my whining about wanting to enjoy Christmas more than anyone else around me here. And of course, it doesn't make things better that the Christmas season at LeTourneau sets in right at the most hellacious part of the year and thus I really don't have time to enjoy it there. Christmas decorations? Yeah right. Note to self: enjoy Christmas more when you're off on your own.

2003-12-17T23:01:00.000-06:00

I went and saw Return of the King. It was epic. I am going to have to go see it again very shortly. I could nit-pick all of the parts I didn't like or how the plot was improperly followed and details were left out, added and rearranged, but everyone will do that and it isn't necessary. Suffice that I will say that I agreed with Wilson on the sheer patheticness of the light-beam effects in RotK: Gandalf's staff driving back the Nazgul should have looked more impressive than a flashlight and the same goes for Sauron's red-hued flashlight.

On movie adaptations of books as a whole I will say this. A director is much more talented if he can use his limited resources and budget along with the limitations of physics and acting to stick to the plot of an adapted writing than if said director changes things to make it easier to film. What's worse is if a director changes things merely because he dislikes a particular part of a story and wants to make it go another way.

As much as I have loved Jackson's Lord of the Rings, the simple fact of the matter is that Tolkien was a masterful writer and developed a much better story than anything Jackson could do by altering the original. Jackson is less guilty than most directors in that his film sticks closer to the original than is status quo. That said, just about any major change Jackson has made either takes away from the plot continuity or just has a lesser effect than what Tolkien had written. I will grant that Jackson has done marvels with Gollum and also has done marvels with screenplay, but I am not willing to say that merely because Jackson has done well, we shouldn't beg for him to do better.

In any event, that's my bit of whining on that... and I will make one final note that seeing movies in Cincinnati is just so much better than seeing them in Longview because the prices aren't that much higher and the theaters are SO much better. If you ever have occasion to come by, ask me to take you to see a movie at The Rave and you'll see what I mean.

2003-12-17T13:31:00.000-06:00

For better or worse, I am in Ohio. And today, in about 3 hours, I get to go see Return of the King. And now I shall laugh at all of you who cannot see it today.

In other news, Cincinnati is a great place to go do things late night if you want to go downtown. My brother has been going to University of Cincinnati all semester and knows all of the great places that are open until 4 or 5 am or open 24 hours. I wish Longview was cool like that.

I renewed my driver's license today and now the picture on it transformed from a young-looking teenager to a stoned-looking college student. It's pretty crazy looking.

Nothing else happening around these parts thus far. Sooner or later, the famed Perkins run will go down again, and I will be relaying stories of goodness and entertainment to all. Until then, feel free to IM me when I get on and I will talk to you as much as I can.

2003-12-15T11:01:00.000-06:00

One of the better quotes I've run across of late:

Justice Curtis on the Dred Scott case in 1858
"When a strict interpretation of the Constitution according to the fixed rules which govern interpretation of laws is abandoned and the theoretical opinions of individuals allowed to control its meaning, we have no longer a Constitution. We're under a government of individual men who for the time being have the power to declare what the Constitution is, according to their own views of what they think it ought to be."

2003-12-15T10:45:00.000-06:00

So yeah... a couple of goofballs from Washington convinced me to join this other guy's forum (note: he is related to the goofballs and lives in the same house with them.) Don't go spamming the thing or anything or I will have to authorize him to hunt you down and kill you. But if you like a good and honest discussion with a very friendly atmosphere, this is a good place.

That said, there was a wonderful thread about this forum called ClayShaker which, from what I understand, is intended to be a fairly positive Christian forum where people can fellowship and enjoy each others' company. Unfortunately, the admin of this forum is a 19-year-old college student with some interesting takes on leadership (read: he would make a good LU admin) which include: deleting posts which upset him and/or challenge the way he administers the board, banning people for doing such things, and construing disagreement about the two aforementioned policies as running afoul of them and thus cause for deleting disagreeing posts and banning users. Granted, from what I understand, policy is not concrete on this and in fact part of the problem is there really is no clear and defined policy and thus the only certainty is uncertain ambiguity.

Now, I normally would stay about as far away from something I know this little about except that the admin is being an ass-hat and people are so fed up with it that they feel the need to discuss it somewhere, just to purge it. So, they went over to this other forum and proceeded to do so, and things were going well and I made one or two posts to try and help clarify what was going on and channel things in a good direction.

Well, as can be expected and even predicted, last night the admin of ClayShaker caught wind of this outpouring and was not happy. He rolled in and linked up this board on ClayShaker to encourage his people to come over and "fight the good fight." To be fair he brought one intelligent person with him whom I was happy to talk with. However, he also brought two morons and he himself was acting the part of a complete and total ass.

So I responded in about the nicest and most contrite way you will ever see the Cynic roll with, and the idiocy just kept on flinging. Now, as predicted, said admin is going to ban all offending parties from his board unless they come back on their knees and kiss up and try to resolve their differences in the dark, in secret. Does this sound to you guys like something LU admin would pull? All I can say is that we need to hire this guy, because he's got all the makings of a successful LeTourneau administrator and he's only 19: wants to resolve all problems in secret, is unbiblical, responds very poorly to admonishment, and just acts like a jackass... oh yeah, and there's no way on earth that he could be wrong.

All of that said, Cory (the guy whose forum this is) has called a moratorium on this thread for a while to cool it down and hopefully shed the light of reason rather than rampant emotion on it (from the perspective of the reasonable crowd)... so if you go over and read, don't respond to this pile of idiocy. Yes, we know it's there... we're just trying to give it some time so we don't have to drag it out and shoot it like the rabid dog it is.

2003-12-15T00:50:00.000-06:00

And now, we are finally at the end of the semester. In fact, we're at the holding period wherein I wish I could just be going home and everything would be right... but it's not.

In the end I really try to believe that God is working this all out for good, but it's so damned hard to see that from in the trenches. Nearly, all of my friends have gone home, leaving me nearly alone in this dorm. I stayed over because I went to a wedding with Anna today that was supposed to have signalled the real beginning of my break and the start of a nice and enjoyable 4-week break together. Sadly, this is not how things are working out.

Said aforementioned girlfriend has fallen victim to mono. As such, it has necessitated a change of plans and is sending her home to Colorado whereas I am still going home to Ohio. So, instead of the nice, enjoyable 3 weeks at Christmas with Anna... I have 3 weeks of wishing I could be with my sick girlfriend who will be 1000 miles away. I'm trying to put a positive spin on this, but it sound hollow and trite.

The fact of the matter is that I've always seen people who try and see the silver lining on the stormclouds as morons. Can't you see that things suck? What's the point in contenting yourself with the paltry pittance that is all you have to be happy about?

But in the midst of all of this, I have to admit that there just really isn't much point obsessing over the shitty facts of reality. Yes, it fucking sucks... I know it, you know it, we all know it. But in the end there are only two real options, get over it or don't. And since I plan on getting over it sooner or later, I might as well just get over it now. Granted, the next 3 weeks are going to suck, but I'm going to make the most of the time I have left here in Longview and I'm going to try and enjoy the company of my friends as much as is possible.

That said, I'm having a really hard time getting over it and moving on. I can stop obsessing... but I'm having a really hard time trying to stop feeling like shit. And this, ladies and gents, is why I had exiled my damnable emotions to Tahiti. They bothered me a hell of a lot less there.

2003-12-13T22:42:00.000-06:00

All of the warped links fit to print:

Crazy! Apparently, elephants are hijacking sugar trucks in Bangkok.

And on the animal note... allegedly, pigeons are faster than the internet. Continuing on to other warped animals... this turkey tried to rape a man.

Speaking of odd sexuality, a transsexual in Taipei is confusing its jailors.

In other bad news, crazy adherants of bizarre sects of Christianity who hail from Michigan are wandering about my fine home state of Ohio and breaking traffic laws. In better news, they're endangering their offspring.

And finally, face scanners are being implemented in schools in Phoenix, AZ in an attempt to find missing students and pick up sex offenders in schools. Invasion of privacy, anyone? Not to mention a shaky history of facial recognition.... Can we say, "Law suit?"

2003-12-12T00:14:00.000-06:00

I finally got around to taking that Brain Test. I was fairly impressed by the accuracy of 25 or so questions.

Auditory : 53%
Visual : 46%
Left : 72%
Right : 27%

Cynic, you are mildly left-hemisphere dominant while showing a slight preference for auditory processing. This overall combination seems to indicate a well-working blend of logic and judgment and organization, with sufficient intuition, perception and creativity to balance that dominance.

You will at times experience conflict between how you feel and what you think which will generally be resolved in favor of what you think. You will find yourself interested in the practical applications of whatever material you have learned or whatever situation you face and will retain the ability to refine whatever knowledge you possess or aspects of whatever position you are in.

By and large, you will orient yourself toward intellectual activities and structure. Though not rigid, you will schedule yourself, plan, and focus on routine and continuity of operations, rather than on changes and disruptions

When changes or disruptions occur, you are likely to consider first how to ensure that such disruptions do The same balance is reflected in your sensory preference. You will tend to be reflective and measured in your interaction style. For the most part, you will be considered objective without being cold and goal-oriented while retaining the capacity to listen to others.

Preferentially you learn by listening and maintaining significant internal dialogues with yourself. Nevertheless, you have sufficient visualization capabilities to benefit from using graphs, charts, doodles, or even body movement to enhance your comprehension and memory.

To the extent that you are even implicitly aware of your hemispheric dominance and sensory style, you will feel most comfortable in those arenas which emphasize verbal skills and logic. Teaching, law, and science are those that stand out among the professions, along with technical sales and management.

2003-12-11T23:19:00.000-06:00

Which Lord of the Rings character and personality problem are you?

Congratulations! You're Merry!

brought to you by Quizilla

2003-12-10T02:33:00.000-06:00

Due to a sleep deprivation and a need to amuse myself and others, I proffer this story pulled from my files:

Now sit back and let me tell you the tale of the Idiot Boy. Long ago (something like 3.5 years ago to be exact) I was a Junior in high school and it was the second semester. Due to the extreme grief and aggravation that Spanish had caused me during the angst-ridden 3 semesters of it that I was forced to take, I decided upon taking a new language to fill the void in my schedule. And so it was that Latin entered my high school experience. And I did take Latin and lo, it made sense. This was not vile Spanish where laws of spelling, pronunciation, and verb conjugation varied like the winter winds on the high seas, but where peace, tranquility, and a general holding to the rules was king. And it was good and there was happiness. But to my dismay, this class was riddled with fools.

At every side, there were morons whom the other languages had rejected and foisted off on poor Magistra. Among the ranks of the morons were Davus - the wrestler who had taken far too many hits to the head, Michaelus - to whom the secrets of passing high school in less than 6 years had not been imparted but who was not quite foolish enough to drop out, Dustinius - the compulsive skipper of school (he regularly missed 2 days a week) and least likely to pass a drug test, and last and most foolish Robertus, commonly referred to as "Idiot Boy".

Now Idiot Boy was a particularly dislikeable breed of moron. For you see, though he was chief among the morons and even the other fools disdained him as an idiot, he did not realize that he was a fool. Instead, Robertus would play Gameboy during class and scuttle all hopes of possibly learning the material. Worse, he would not do his homework (a similar practice to myself, but the homework was so easy that by the time she got to my spot in the room to check mine it was done) and would whine endlessly about how hard it was. Bear in mind people, we're talking translating simple sentences here and declining such nouns as canis and pater. But worst of all was his simple absence of mind. Class would go something like this:

Magistra: Robertus, what is the Latin word for dog?
Robertus: uh... uh... wait... I know I have this one.... just one second
Magistra: Robertus, at least look it up for us, it's not that hard
Iosius (unable to take it any more): whispers canis, you moron, canis
Robertus: uh.... can is (pronounced like can and iz)
Magistra: Iosius, stop helping him out, Robertus it's canis.

And thus idiot boy's reputation did plummet. For you see, Robertus would ask the same question every day for a week sometimes and even after Magistra had answered it 6 or 7 times he would still be horribly confused. But he refused to work and refused to study and continued to fail even the easiest vocabulary test (10 words a week, you just had to spell the Latin when she gave the English equivalent, not that hard)

But then, it would seem, Robertus struck upon a plan: he would cheat and get a 100 on his next vocabulary test. So Robertus craftily wrote down his words and definitions on a cheat sheet and dropped it on the floor next to his foot when test time came. But about three words in something went horribly, horribly wrong for Robertus.... Magistra spied his cheat sheet... for even in cheating he lived up to his nickname. Robertus had used bright pink paper to write his cheat sheet on. It was hard to miss. And upon closer inspection, Magistra did see Idiot Boy's deceit and treachery. And Idiot Boy did receive a 0 on the test. Through incidents like these (he got caught cheating again later in the semester when he wrote the answers on his desk in permanent ink and failed to wash them off in time) he became one of the 2 people out of 75 to fail Latin I that entire year... the other being Dustinius, who failed not on lack of merit, but because if you miss more than 8 days in a semester without a good reason you can't get credit for a class and Dustinius missed 30 without much of a reason.

Now... to more recent events.

I had found myself working with Robertus (Idiot Boy) at Kroger over Christmas break last year. This was not a happy development, but I tried to grin and bear it. But Idiot Boy did recognize me and remembered my disdain for him and did tell one of our co-workers the following: "Cynic always treated me like I was some sort of moron in our Latin class. But really I'm not stupid, I just act stupid a whole lot."

2003-12-09T10:46:00.000-06:00

Just when I thought that humanity couldn't get any dumber... this moron proves me wrong.

And apparently foreign hookers are now informing science. Quite something...

2003-12-08T15:36:00.000-06:00

This is quite possibly the best disturbed link of the semester. Same Jack Chick style, different author.

Thanks Dunny.

And here's a wonderful little page about the "evil" white man. Quite entertaining. Racist ignorance is universal.

Now Playing
Metallica - No Leaf Clover

2003-12-08T01:34:00.000-06:00

My lazy self is just getting around to posting my finals schedule:

Monday:
12:45 PM - 02:45 PM Digital Electronics
08:00 PM - 10:00 PM Only Inklings

Tuesday:
09:45 AM - 11:45 AM Software Systems

Thursday:
09:45 AM - 11:45 AM Numerical Analysis

Other Assignments Due:
Tuesday - 12:00 AM Learning from Leaders (paper)
Thursday - 9:45 AM Numerical Analysis (extra credit program)

Add in that wonderful work shift from 2:30 (or whenever I get out of Digital) until 6 and that will be a ball-breaker of a Monday.

Here's a funny little story if you've been following the SCO vs. Linux debacle. If you haven't it's funny anyways. Not really warped but my mind is too scrambled for warped right now.

Now Playing
Third Eye Blind - Narcolepsy

2003-12-07T02:58:00.000-06:00

As I sit here thinking that I should REALLY go to bed, I need to put up a quasi-happy post and just say the following: I have the best girlfriend and the best friends ever. I was truly awed by the amount of effort taken on my behalf to take me out to dinner on Friday night and give me a good evening out.

Even in the midst of finals, sickness, projects and the like my friends took me out to dinner in some little town (Jefferson I think) in this nifty little Italian Restaurant with a hotel upstairs. We then proceeded to wander around town for a bit and then drive to Marshall and go to a coffee house where I was treated to coffee and cheesecake (it was good Moore, too bad you couldn't make it) and a rousing game of Scrabble. And as all good Friday nights go, it was finished off by Honors Bible Study.

Thanks to all of you who could come and thanks to those who wanted to and couldn't... I am just honored to have such great people around. You bastards are the reason that I can't just be a cold callous cynic all of the time... :). Now, especially to Wheeler... get better, NOW!

Now Playing
Trapt - Headstrong

2003-12-07T02:09:00.000-06:00

More reading back through this old forum has brought to mind some old stories from back in the summer between my freshman and sophomore years in college.

Back then I worked a temp job through Office Team at Miami University in Middletown as a telephone survey facilitator at the Applied Research Center. I worked for Dr. Seufert making phone calls and fixing all technology that broke. When I wasn't actually fixing things or making fruitless calls, I administered surveys (hopefully I managed 1/hour, but frequently I got much less than that.)

(It has been noted that I have a somewhat dark view of humanity and have been known to posit that people are stupid on a fairly regular basis. Reading on should give you some indicator as to why I feel as I do.)

Here are some of the fun things I came up with while surveying (all true stories, I wrote them down as I surveyed):

Cynic (on the phone): "Hello sir, my name is Cynic and I'm calling from...."
Man on the other end: "Y'all need to stop sendin' me stuff"
Cynic: "Uh, sir, I haven't even told you who I was calling from, and we don't send out any "stuff"
Man: "I'm sure y'all have been sending me somethin, and I ain't got time for this crap"
Cynic: "Sir, could I at least tell you whom I'm calling with so that you could make a more iinformed judgement"
Man: "No, just quit sending me stuff and leave me alone"
Cynic(muttering to himself): "I guess I mark that as a hung up and he gets called back until he politely refuses or completes the survey"

...

Cynic (on the phone): Now I'm going to read a series of statements and you need to tell me 'yes' or 'no' to each of them.
Man: Ok
Cynic: I will encourage my child to say 'no' to sex
Man: Is that until they're married or altogether, because while I want my kids to abstain until they're married, they're not like my neighbor's kids. I don't want THEM to EVER reproduce.
Cynic: Well, I'd assume it's just until married, but the question doesn't say. Oddly enough, nobody's ever picked up on that before....

...

Cynic: I'm going to read some income catagories and I want you to stop me when I reach the one that includes the approximate total annual income of your household.
Crazy Lady: I don't have any income.
Cynic: I mean for your entire household... everyone who has income in your household.
C L: We have no income
Cynic: ok..... [marks the less than $10,000 a year bracket]
Cynic: Now how many kids do you have?
C L: 4
Cynic: And how old are they?
C L: 17, 14, 12, 9
Cynic: And how old are you?
C L: 28

<Cynic is now on the phone with Crazy Lady's son>

Cynic: Do you feel it's wise or foolish to attend parties where alcohol...
Crazy Son: [interrupting] I'm not allowed to go to parties
Cynic: Ok.... And how do your friends feel about attending....
C S: [interrupts again] I'm not allowed to have friends
Cynic: Uh... ok, well.....
C S: I'm not allowed to go out of the house without my cousin or my mother
Cynic: ok....

[towards the end of giving the survey to Crazy Son]

Cynic: How old were you on your last birthday?
C S: I'm not allowed to celebrate my birthday
Cynic: Ok, how old are you?
C S: 17

Cynic: [ends the survey and cowers in fear that people like this exist]

And my personal favorite...

Cynic: "Our information says that Jimmy has asthma"
Sadistic Lady: "He got cured"
Cynic: "Cured?"
S L: "Yeah, we got a surgery for him.... we drilled 2 holes in his sinuses and broke off some bones"
Cynic: "Bones?"
S L "Yeah, they was gettin the the way of his his breathin'"
Cynic: "Uh.... ok..... I think you're ineligible for the survey ma'am"

Now Playing
Linkin Park - From the Inside

2003-12-06T13:01:00.000-06:00

I was trolling through an old thread on a forum that a friend of mine runs. I found this wonderful comment that I made about 2 years ago:

"Indeed? Are you so arrogant as to presume that your individual ability supersedes the inherent weakness of your gender? Is it possible that even one could escape the vacuous wasteland that is the sum of all female intelligence? Perish the thought. There is no such thing as female intelligence, only the modicum of perceived thought that is the imitation of male ingenuity. There is nothing more, anything that could presumed otherwise is only a clever charade or the plagiarism of an idea that originated from some poor man."

I need to go find some more of my old Chauvinist writings to properly re-inspire myself.

Now Playing
Evanescence - Where Will You Go?

2003-12-05T15:27:00.000-06:00

My life is rated R.
What is your life rated?

Is there any real suprise here?

Now Playing
Godsmack - Voodoo

2003-12-05T01:16:00.000-06:00

Well, Wilson and I are picking fights with people over the whole Iraq debacle. I posted this in the comments in response to some rather interesting reasoning posted by a reader who was in turn responding to this post on Wilson's blog (blue is me, italics is a guy named Shrode:

I believe Saddam was a threat. But not for the reasons you mentioned. He was the backbone of an attitude in the region that supported terrorism.

I would really like some justification for this line of reason. Bluster aside, Saddam was a cowed dictator who played silly cat-and-mouse games from within his borders and talked a big fight. How was he more of a backbone than any other leader in the region?

You see supporting terrorism at ANY level must be seen as a threat to us by us. That is why he had to be taken out. To set an example and change the region. Other countries with similar mindsets must learn that even flirting with terrorists is a risk to their very existence. He gave rewards to PLO and Hamas families of suicide bombers. We must destroy all terrorists and all supporters of terrorists.

So on what level do we draw the line? Idealogical? So are we now going to invade North Korea? How about communist China? What about Colombia?

Why don't we attack Saudi Arabia? By all indications, they have many more citizens who support terrorists on an individual scale than anything Iraq could do? What about Syria and Yemen? I would argue the inaction of these governments in some way indicates a support of terrorism and probably does more harm than Iraq has in the last 10 years.

And it is a just war to do so because it is self defense. Where our government has been inconsistent, and where Bush dissapoints me, is in not giving Israel full support in its war on terrorism. We have also not helped the UK in its fight against the IRA enough. We must wipe out all terrorists everywhere. I kill all scorpions on my property whether they are in my house or not. Because I know that if my child happened to get near one it would get stung. We must hunt down and destroy all terrorists period. And that I believe is a consistent conservative (and Biblical) position.

So now all pre-emptive strikes against prospective terrorists and supporters of terrorists are now justified by self-defense? Who decides what is a terrorist problem and if we get to strike them? And are we still advocating that Bush make unilateral strikes like he has thus far?

As far as UK and IRA goes, this is a non-issue anymore. And as for Israel, is not the Israeli government equally culpable for a war of terror against the Palestinians? Justifying huge collateral damage in the name of "National Security". Wow... that sounds awfully familiar *cough*Ashcroft*cough*... but I digress.

I find your casual assertion that the U.S. should strike out against anyone who would possibly support terror worldwide to be at least mildly distasteful. On what grounds do we invade sovereign nations? Pre-emptive self defense? Being idealogically anti-American? And I'm really questioning where on earth you're getting a Biblical support for all of this.

Now Playing
Cake - Italian Leather Sofa

2003-12-04T21:46:00.000-06:00

Well, I guess most of the hell week is over. And all of a sudden everyone is getting sick. Stop getting sick you fools...

In order to facilitate the willpower necessary, I come bearing two warped links.

Disturbed Links of the Day:
Special Crafts (thanks Dang)
Special Surgery for Women (thanks Gallagher)

Now Playing
Goo Goo Dolls - Imaginary Friend

2003-12-03T18:38:00.000-06:00

All time new lows for screwed up are upon us!

Disturbed Link of the Day: Fox News story on German court proceedings

Now Playing
Matchbox 20 - Long Day

2003-12-03T00:42:00.000-06:00

Today I went out and bought a new set of speakers to replace my old, jacked-up set that had served faithfully for 2 years. In the end, a power pin sheared off and brought an end to an otherwise-great run.

And then I went from July to December without music or sound. At first it wasn't so bad... I really don't need sound for most of what I do and considering that for the first 2 months after this I was in an apartment with a group of guys who had music to run, I didn't mind. But slowly throughout the semester, I have grown to miss my music. And it has grown into insanity. I have come to miss my music to the point that I listen to music nonstop in the labs (where I have working speakers) and one day last week, I just grabbed my discman and put on the headphones so I could hear music.

In the end I did what I had to do, I took the remainder of my birthday money plus some of my own and went and bought speakers. Italian Leather Sofa never sounded so good...

Now Playing
Third Day - These Thousand Hills

2003-12-02T15:13:00.000-06:00

Well, part of the work is over and another bit is yet to begin. I really hate this week.

2003-12-01T14:57:00.000-06:00

Happy Birthday to me... I think. I'm another year older... and I have the shittiest week ever to have a birthday. It's always right during hell week/finals. I REALLY need a drink... (of water, Doug.)

2003-11-30T17:20:00.000-06:00

Most days I like politics... the process, the deal-making, the smoke-filled rooms... it just appeals to a certain part of me that revels in intricacy. Wilson and I have a great deal of fun talking about it... frequently dragging the Guatemalan into discussions and just enjoying the great political theories that we come up with. Of late however, I have not been enjoying politics, and most of that is due to the fact that I can't find anyone whose foreign policy I can support.

The ditto-heads and Republican Party faithful out there will tell me that I should stick with Bush because he's doing the right thing. My problem with that is the war on Iraq was NOT JUSTIFIED, at least... not like Bush justified it. If we ever find WMD's, I will be very surprised (thanks for the link, Wilson.) If we even find good evidence of them, it will be a good deal more than we have now. The fact of the matter is that justifying this war on the basis that Iraq was an international threat is bullshit. North Korea is a threat, China is an international threat, Iran is an international threat.... hell, our allies like Israel are more of an international threat than Iraq was.

What it all boils down to is that while there might be good reasons to justify the invasion of Iraq, they weren't the reasons employed for invading Iraq. What's worse is the outcome of these arguments. "Potential support of terrorism?" Great, so now we're fighting pre-emptive wars? "Human rights?" This one is even better because if we're all of a sudden fighting wars to free the denizens of countries from Human Rights opression, we're going to be doing a lot of fighting, including against allies such as Saudi Arabia and China.

My general concern is this: either the Bush administration actually believed that there were WMD's in Iraq or they didn't. If they did, and they were there, then we have a good bit of digging to do and all of our intelligence right now is wrong. If the WMD's weren't there, then our pre-war intel. has a lot of explaining to do. If our pre-war intel. said that there weren't WMD's and we went in anyways, then we have some sort of unterior motivation that isn't being addressed and the president is lying to the world and the American people. Any of these ways, I'm at least slightly annoyed and assuming that there aren't still undiscovered WMD's out there, I'm downright irritated.

But in the end, what am I going to do? Vote for Dean? I'd rather move to France.

2003-11-30T14:49:00.000-06:00

Not that I think many of you will have a variety of results, but go take the Belief-O-Matic Quiz.

Here's how I came out:

1.	Mainline to Conservative Christian/Protestant (100%)
2.	Seventh Day Adventist (89%)
3.	Eastern Orthodox (86%)
4.	Orthodox Quaker (86%)
5.	Roman Catholic (86%)
6.	Mainline to Liberal Christian Protestants (75%)
7.	Islam (62%)
8.	Orthodox Judaism (62%)
9.	Liberal Quakers (49%)
10.	Hinduism (48%)
11.	Bah?'? Faith (40%)
12.	Unitarian Universalism (39%)
13.	Reform Judaism (38%)
14.	Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (Mormons) (36%)
15.	Jehovah's Witness (34%)
16.	Mahayana Buddhism (32%)
17.	Theravada Buddhism (32%)
18.	Jainism (30%)
19.	Sikhism (29%)
20.	Christian Science (Church of Christ, Scientist) (26%)
21.	New Thought (26%)
22.	Nontheist (25%)
23.	Scientology (24%)
24.	New Age (21%)
25.	Neo-Pagan (20%)
26.	Taoism (15%)
27.	Secular Humanism (14%)

2003-11-30T00:59:00.000-06:00

I found another great webcomic: FLEM

Here's one I can show you:

Here's one I shouldn't post. Go check it out only if you enjoy my warped links.

On the other hand for something clean and still quite funny, check out this video.

2003-11-29T16:39:00.000-06:00

I've been fiddling with some homework as well as a D&D campaign that I'm working up for next semester and I've been mulling over the whole Dungeons and Dragons thing, especially in the light of those conservatives who claim it is strictly demonic. After all, my parents (especially my father) are given to the notion that the whole thing is bad. Granted, they're only working on what they've been told be hyperconservatives (bear in mind, when D&D was in the news bigtime, some mentally unstable people committed suicide over it and at the time my parents were at a church with some very conservative Bob Jones alums) and my father really isn't into the fantastical anyways, but it's still frustrating that I more or less lie to my parents rather than hash this out with them.

Going over things in my head, my points essentially boil down to this:
1) D&D is just like reading fantasy, it isn't real... just imagination.
2) Consequently, the only real moral value it has is what you make of it.
3) D&D is NOT a guide to witchcraft and sorcery (check this out for a humorous commentary on the matter; thanks Gallagher)
4) While D&D might be used to draw people into the occult, so could things like the Chronicles of Narnia and Lord of the Rings...

I guess the point I'm trying to make is that D&D is not intrinsically evil, it has just been used to evil ends. The same could be said for any number of things, including well-meaning Christians. In fact, I would go so far as to say that there are probably more drawn away from God by overzealous Christians who venture out of God's plan than by any D&D book.

That said, I recognize that people tend to be uncomfortable with the notion and that D&D is one of the fringe elements of nerd-dom that gets the furthest away from the norm. Therefore, as a policy, I try not to invite anyone to come and play with us who hasn't asked. We don't make it a secret that we play as a rule (there are exceptions) but we also try not to beat people over the head and drag them in. If anyone wants to play, we welcome them.

So there... not sure why I went off on that topic... but to quote a favorite movie line:

"Well.... there it is"

2003-11-29T02:51:00.000-06:00

I performed an experiment today in response to all of the whining that's been going on due to the "cold" outside. I went back to my room and pulled out all of the clothes that I'm never seen in and went on a walk. Jeans, socks, shoes, sweater, coat... and it wasn't cold outside, not even a little. I don't know what everyone is whining about. The only thing that even bothered me slightly was the cold wind, and so I got out some ear warmers from one of my pockets and all was well. About half-way around the loop, I had to open my coat up becaue I was getting hot.

Update: performed the same experiment this afternoon and walked over to Bodacious... still not cold.

2003-11-28T11:47:00.000-06:00

Well... I was performing the perfunctory Google search today, and it would appear that when I put my first and last names in without quotes, I end up on the first page. So thank you all for linking me by that, I think it's time to start cracking skulls and beating people to get my link changed. I kind of like anonymity.

2003-11-28T02:18:00.000-06:00

Well... one day down and I'm feeling much more rested. Maybe with a couple more of these I'll be able to take out the rest of the semester.

Whenever I walk down the empty hall of 1B when everyone is out of town, I get a bit reminiscent and philosophical about all of the guys who have come through on my watch. So here's to the few who made it, and the many that didn't.

Here's to Hex: the man who IRC'ed, played D&D and video-gamed and never really made it to much class or bed.
Here's to Pooder: the man who wished he was Canadian.
Here's to Hog: the man who played DAOC so hard he woke up on his keyboard more than once.
Here's to Kass: the quiet man who the system screwed and made it out anyways.
Here's to Woobadoo: the most disturbed guy to ever wander the floor and the worst influence on Gecko yet.
Here's to Ivan: the man who got asked out by Saga Troll Lady's daughter and run off by his roommate.
Here's to Tim: the man who married a girl from ETBU.
Here's to Ronnie: the man who could be counted on to roll in on Sunday as we rolled out for church.
Here's to Gary: the man whose room stank up the entire hall when his door was opened.
Here's to Groody: the man who escaped into the worst job market ever and got stuck in Longview.
Here's to YourMom: the man who left us those wonderful Senate pictures.
Here's to Randrew: the man who got out, got hitched, lived on campus another year, and is still sticking around.
Here's to Aaron: the RA whose soul couldn't be saved with only 37 chapels.
Here's to Micah: the man who dealt with Gary, ate the cats, and then got called elsewhere to the military.
Here's to Baba: the man who attempted 12 hours, and probably didn't even go to class 12 times.
Here's to Tom: my unofficial roommate in Fall '02 who had moved off campus but still showered on 1B.
Here's to Odom: the man who asked for programming help at 2am for a program due in 6 hours.
Here's to Doc: the man who Damian and I single-handedly traumatized more than is decent.
Here's to the Kormex: the man who played the video games, got great grades in EE classes, and promises to return next year.
Here's to Cowboy: the man whose listening ear and wise wit kept me sane through POD.
Here's to Singer: the man who captained the soccer team and left lusting after the championship we never got.

Wow: that's a lot. That doesn't count Dave and Luke, who pledged my freshman year. 21 guys who left the floor. Out of those, 5 graduated. Baba gets the award for closest to graduating with 9 hours shy on dropout. Hex gets the award for the guy who was here with me the shortest period of time, Ivan was he biggest recluse, and Pooder and Woob have to tie for the oddest.

I miss those guys...

2003-11-27T00:10:00.000-06:00

So... it's been an interesting couple of days and I'm sticking in town for the Thanksgiving break while everyone else is heading off elsewhere. I must say that there is entirely too much work to get done this weekend for me to be burning time and not really doing anything yet... but I do need a break and hopefully I will be able to get everything done that I need to after I get a bit of rest.

Hopefully I will be able to get more up tomorrow... I'm going to take it easy and go to get some food at around 5 at a benevolent professor's house with some friends of mine. Until then, I'll be sleeping, watching football, and maybe doing some work. Until next time... remember: "While there are many trees in the world, goldfish don't like tomato juice."

2003-11-24T01:23:00.000-06:00

A friend of mine has been doing a critique on a paper for one of his. Whomever wrote this thing needs to take the English Review and a couple of remedial English Composition classes... not to mention some basic rhetoric.

Some interesting sentences include:

"This obedience was not merely legalistic and works oriented although it did involve a very legal aspect, since in Adam's failure all men have failed (Romans 5:12)."

"The nature of their fall seems to have set a precedent for further sin in the world that had formerly been good. Prior to the temptation of the snake Adam and Eve seem to have been quite content within the garden."

"Adam and Eve's trust in God and his promises and prohibitions is where their happiness lied."

"Genesis never explicitly states a leadership role for Adam in terms of relationships between people until after the fall when it was declared that the woman's desire would be for her husband."

(I would like to note that I have been taking great pain to be sure to copy the grammar, spelling, and punctuation on these.)

Now, my personal favorite just so happens to be the understatement of the millenium: "The fall of Adam and Eve is an interesting turn of events in the history of mankind."

Wow...

So what, the flood was an interesting turn of events in global meteorology?

The birth of Christ was an interesting turn of events in Christian Theology?

The Creation was an interesting turn of events in cosmology (and maybe even geography?)

The fall of Communism was an interesting turn of events in contemporary international politics?

The bombing of Pearl Harbor was an interesting turn of events in World War 2?

France was an interesting turn of events?

Long story short.... this shit is special.

Anyone out there with an interesting turn of events?

2003-11-23T14:14:00.000-06:00

A fitting commentary on my favorite hardware platform:

2003-11-20T18:55:00.000-06:00

Well, that's enough of that melancholy shit. And now for some pleasant thoughts... or at least mildly so.

Today in class, Varnell told us that God is happy and God wants us to be happy. In the interest of getting out of class and not strangling the man, I didn't object strenuously. I should have maimed him for that. God is joyful (as in the joy of the Lord) and God wants us to be joyful and content. However, that is not the same thing as happy.

Nothing else particularly interesting on the mind at the moment, except that some jackass was messing with my brother and making fun of his departed friend... so if any of my mildly unethical friends who aren't avowed to be good little computer users want to jack with IP 157.89.184.220, I wouldn't mind. It resolves to an Eastern Kentucky University IP, so it should be fairly stable and mostly on.

Disturbed Link of the Day: Dwarf Tossing Banned (so what, there was a problem with dwarf tossing before this?)

2003-11-18T02:16:00.000-06:00

The saga of my brother continues, but right now it's moreso with him. Most of you are familiar with the fact that all of my compassion put together could fit in a small thimble. The pure reverse is true of my brother. He cares so much that sometimes it scares him that people might take advantage of him and to that end he has a the facade of a cactus. Underneath that cactus, however, is a man who would give the shirt off his back along with his pants to someone who needed them. He's cynical enough and perceptive enough to see through people... but when someone really needs help, my brother is the first person in there to give it.

I'm sure some of you are familiar with the concept of survivor guilt. Now take that, and imagine you could have made several dozen different choices in the hours leading up to a friend's death that might have avoided that death. In light of that, I can't even begin to understand what my brother, who would gladly have given himself in exchange for his friend, must be feeling at this point... and I know it must really suck.

That said, pray for my brother... he's in a really dark place and it's one of those wounds that only God and time can heal.

2003-11-16T17:48:00.000-06:00

Well, I have more information regarding my brother. Here is a news story related to the gorge accident. Talking to my mother, apparently there was underage consumption involved and a friend of mine was the person buying the beer. Now I really don't have a problem with underage consumption provided the person that is buying knows that those involved are responsible and they won't be hurting themselves. However, drinking paired with tall cliffs is NOT a good idea.

That said, pray for my friends who were involved with this. I knew just about everyone involved in this, most of them go to the church that I'm a member at. Two of them had to carry the body at least part of the way out, a task that my brother would have usually undertaken if it weren't such a close friend of his. My brother is VERY traumatized and upset about this and could really use prayer. The friend that bought the beer could be facing legal problems and has had to procure a lawyer, and thus he is also very much in need of prayer.

The circumstances surrounding this pretty much amount to this: my brother has been camping down at the Gorge for about a year. In that time, he has taken many people from the church with him. A lot of people are realizing that this could have been them or this could have been their kids. I'm shook up at the thought that this could have been my brother and at the same time, I grieve for him and know that this has to be unspeakably hard. The guy who died was a very close friend: his only real friend at UC. The two had been going through Young Life leadership training together and spent much time together. This is going to be a very hard couple of months.

2003-11-15T19:43:00.000-06:00

The spectre of death seems uncomfortably close of late. I just got off talking to my brother and apparently he and some guys went rock climbing yesterday and one of they guys he went with fell to his death. This is coming close on the heels of a wonderful conversation I had with a friend discussing what she would do if the choice came down to either she died or a baby she was going to have died.

You see, I've never really had any real fear of dying myself. I mean, sure, it would suck... but I guess my faith in where I am eternally doesn't let me get really bothered about that. But losing friends, that's the thing that scares me. When Bekah died the summer between Freshman and Sophomore year, it was like a piece of me got ripped out. I knew her for less than a year, and yet she was a close friend and losing her hurt... a lot. I can't even imagine what losing some really close friend or family member would be like.

I guess it just all boils down to this: do I have the faith to get through something like that. I pray that if God would put me in that sort of situation that He would also bless me with the faith necessary to get through it... and at the same time pray that nothing like that comes any time soon. Because I'm not so sure I have that much faith.

2003-11-14T01:38:00.000-06:00

On Compassion:

Or more functionally, how I'm not. You see, I understand how I don't deserve grace or mercy and how even trying the hardest that I've ever tried, I'm still no good by a perfect standard. But yet, I have a very hard time helping those who quite obviously don't want to help themselves. It all boils down to this: if you don't want to change and better yourself, I don't want you to either. Some people see how much others really want to be different... I see how much they could be doing to enact that change and aren't. Yes, it's judgemental... but that's how I think.

The same is true with quiet people and ideas. If you want to register on my radar screen (oooh.... RADAR) you're going to have to think that your idea is worth my hearing. I'm sure as hell not going to go fishing around for it. Basically it boils down to this: I respect the people who have the spine to tell me what's up. I really don't respect the people who have something that they know is important but can't pull it together. I just hope it's not something that I desperately needed to hear... because the fact of the matter is that I'm not going to go asking everyone for their stupid ideas just so I can hear one good idea every 3 months that I wouldn't have heard otherwise.

Here's the biggest problem: I don't know what to do about this. I mean, sure, we are supposed to be compassionate. But I am also a fairly firm believer in the Ben Franklin concept of "God Helps Those Who Help Themselves," though in my case it's more of a Andrew Carnegie approach to compassion in that I will help someone, but only after they're proving that they really want it by working themselves and are willing to meet me part way. And sometimes (especially around here) I see too many people willing to give indescriminately without even thinking about what's going on on the receiving end. While I believe in compassion, I equally believe in hard work and determination. And I have a hard time justifying the former without the latter.

Someone toss me a bone and help me clarify this train of thought.

Disturbed Link of the Day: Dude Sues NASA For "Parking Fees" (clean, work-safe, wench-friendly)

2003-11-13T14:51:00.000-06:00

I can't believe they posted this:

Actually I can, but it's still great.

2003-11-12T21:45:00.000-06:00

Oddly enough, for the first time in a long time I've had two decent ideas in the course of two days. Something in the water, of that there is no doubt...

On the topic of denominationalism, is there a justification for different denominations who break fellowship with one another over seemingly-trivial matters? How about the ecumenical movement which seems to be attempting to deepen bonds between churches who have deep-seated theological misgivings about one another, not to mention centuries of bad blood and often violence? What is a good reason to break fellowship, what should the relationship be between these churches, and what is the significance of these divisions?

My personal answer is that there are essentially two reasons for breaking fellowship within the Church:
1) Others are preaching a gospel other than the one preached in the Bible (For if one comes and preaches another Jesus whom we have not preached, or you receive a different spirit which you have not received, or a different gospel which you have not accepted, you bear {this} beautifully. 2 Cor 11:4 [NASB])
2) Others adopt a doctrine that is contrary to clear Biblical teachings and/or amount to sin

Whether or not other denominations are bad enough to be declared outside of the Faith is really not something that I think anyone can make and I firmly believe that there are those who come to a saving Faith in Christ in any number of places, some quite outside of the Church as we understand it. Even so, the prevailing argument that I appeal to here is that continued fellowship with a sect who meets one of the two above criterion damages your own witness and may cause legitimate Christians to stumble.

And on a lighter note:

Five Secrets to A Perfect Relationship

1. It's important to have a woman who helps at home,
who cooks from time to time, cleans up and has a job.

2. It's important to have a woman who can make you
laugh.

3. It's important to have a woman who you can trust
and who doesn't lie to you.

4. It's important to have a woman who is good in bed
and who likes to be with you.

5. It's very, very important that these four women
don't know each other.

Disturbed Link of the Day: Epitome of Disfunctional Marriages

2003-11-10T15:56:00.000-06:00

A couple of us were having a rather interesting discussion on education last night. I'm not sure how it came up exactly... but it boils down to this: "If you had your whole education to do over again and money and acceptance weren't issues, where would you go to school (starting at kindergarten through present?)"

Personally, I know where I would start and that's walking away from public schools. Not that I didn't learn a good bit in public school and I did have a couple of spectacular teachers... but the fact of the matter is that easily 8-10 years of my primary and secondary schooling were wasted in classes where the teacher either couldn't teach or was simply teaching to the bottom of the class. Especially for those of you who did at least some of the public school thing, just stop and think about it: how much of your time in school were you bored because your teachers either were re-hashing stuff that had been gone over 3 times before or were teaching down to the point that you could have sworn there were retarded monkeys in the class with you? Is it like this in private schools as well?

My current theory is that I know I would have opted for a very rigorous private school at least through 8th grade. After all, as much as I would have liked home-schooling, the social development is a must and is quite frequently one of the most neglected things in home-schooled students that I have met. Beyond that I'm torn between more private schooling and boarding school. After all, as much as the former helps, the latter adds the maturity that being responsible for yourself away from parental guidance brings, the social development of living around your peers all of the time, and the academic rigor of living at school. There is of course the painful separation from family and the lack of relationship with one's parents this brings... but boarding school needn't be so far from home to prevent monthly visits and the months of holidays, of course. Having it to do over again, I would probably go boarding school. Of course, there is the whole matter of college left to discussion, but we'll tackle that some other time. For now, just roll that over and respond.

Oh yeah, I almost forgot:

Disturbed Link of the Day: Making Your Job More Bearable

2003-11-09T15:11:00.001-06:00

Thanks Wheeler for finding this:

Raistlin Majere

An intensely private individual that chooses actions with care, you strive to further your own skills and powers.

This happens because I choose it to happen!

Raistlin is a character in the Dragonlance universe. He has a short biography at Dragonlance.com.

Having read a good bit of Dragonlance myself, I find this highly entertaining. It's not so much what I am now, as who I was 5 years ago... but it's still uncanny that this is that dead-on. Those who are more familiar with the book series will appreciate this more.

2003-11-09T15:11:00.000-06:00

Should I be inclined to help people realize the foolishness of their own preconceptions or should I merely stand by and help propogate those preconceptions for their own good? For instance, what if some of the freshmen guys under my watch have been convinced that all LU wenches are heartless emotion-whores who prey on naive guys... should I tell stories and joked to perpetuate this or should I point out that a good number aren't?

I would be inclined to propogate the myth. After all, there are a disproportionately large number of wenches around here who are nothing but bad news... especially to the sheltered home-school variety freshman male that is so prevalent around here. Further, an even larger number of those wenches that these sheltered frosh will see will be of the problematic and predatory variety. So should I attempt to illuminate them to the truth and in the process dispel the unnatural and useful cynicism that such a sterotype brings? Hardly. The fact of the matter is that if the frosh aren't sharp enough to figure out that stereotypes are merely generalizations and not universally applicable, they probably aren't wise enough to deal with the LeTourneau brand of heartless wench nor capable enough to even manage a friendship with an amicable one.

I am not here to teach social skills, I am merely looking to prevent emotional episodes in the parts of the world that I frequent... because let's face it: relationships get messy and I don't want to have to walk through the aftermath. If only the cynics are out there dealing with the female populace of LU, we're going to have a lot fewer episodes and thus, my life is easier and more tolerable. Plus, it's a lot less visually offensive to have fewer freshmen making out on every bench in sight.

Oh, and just in case you'd been missing them:

Disturbed Link of the Day: Worst Jobs Ever

2003-11-06T15:22:00.000-06:00

Well... I saw Revolutions last night. And I can't help but think that I need to see it again before I can come to a conclusion on it. First impression says that the eye candy of the original can't be beaten. Sure, there were some pretty fight scenes, but the whole endlessly flying into each other scheme gets old. Plus, there's just the general annoyance that Neo started out nearly omnipotent at the end of the original and kept getting weaker throughout. After all, bullets are easy to stop because they're little... but swords are big and slow and thus trickier.

Aside from nitpicking, the 3rd one did bring closure to the series and there was indeed a good bit of mind-jerking that it brought on. I'm going to tackle that after seeing the movie a second time... but for now, I would suggest you go see it yourself.

2003-11-04T19:49:00.000-06:00

Just an odd link to tide you over until I post....

2003-11-03T16:43:00.000-06:00

Mentally I feel like I'm swimming in cement that's about 80% set. It's so much easier to come up with cogent thoughts when you don't have all of this mental taxation going on...

Last night we got together and watched Roger & Me. Ebert did a nice review of it a couple years back that you can find here.

The general sentiment of the movie is that big corporations owe their employees something. Being a good heartless capitalist and a supporter of the mindset of a heartless company, I tend to take a bit of issue with that sentiment, and the train of thought goes a bit something like this:

1) Corporations exist solely to make money (if you disagree with this, one wonders why the hell else a corporation would exist)
2) Employees are resources to this end
2a) Happier employees are generally more productive employees and thus better assets
3) When employees are grossly more costly than their counterparts in another nation who will do the same work for 50% less, it behooves you to do something about this
3a) Go into this knowing this action will make the current employees that you keep unhappy
3b) Even so, this will probably be an acceptable cost against the benefits gained
4) A corporation should exist in a near-virtual moral vacuum: in the end, the only thing that matters is making money
4a) if you disagree with this, cease spending money on said company and divest yourself of its stock... if enough people agree, the company will change the position... again, to make money
5) In the end, the corporation should always bow to the almighty dollar: the reason for its being

Entities that should resist unchecked capitalism to care for the people: government, church

The fact of the matter is that while I generally don't like the government's interference in these matter, the simple truth is that the government ought to be ensuring the safety of its citizens to stay employed rather than be layed off and replaced by citizens of other countries. I'm not sure how much action this will take and where it plays into the balancing act, the fact of the matter is that a company shouldn't be taking a loss or losing out on profits just to make people feel good about themselves. If they're doing that, they're not really a capitalist corporation after all... they're selling themselves and their stockholders short.

And now... because the concrete needs a bit of loosening...

Disturbed Link of the Day: Dave's World

2003-11-02T15:26:00.000-06:00

Well... it's Sunday and if this November is like the last two, things will get much worse before they get any better. Which is probably a dangerous sign considering that I'm tired and stressed-out as is. At least I got to be a bum with my friends yesterday and ended up going to Fall Fest for the first time and with a very lovely date at that. I generally had a good time at Fall Fest, got to sit with some fairly interesting Freshmen, and got to see Ardith look absolutely stunning, all dressed up as 2A's queen. I once read an article somewhere that young men tend to forget the beauty of the women around them because the women tend to dress down to our level. After last night, I can't help but note how true that is.

Following Fall Fest, Anna and I found Wilson and went to the Chai Party. Afterwards we wandered some and ended up back on ELH2 just in time for Anna's headache to develop into a full-blown migraine. After open dorms ended, Wilson and I left behind my ailing girlfriend as we were kicked out to wander and discuss the greater philosophical meanings of life. This terminated with a trip to Caleb's room, where I hung out with the D&D crew there (Wilson excused himself early on) and participated in "Satanic Saturdays" as the DM's NPC monkey until it wee hours in the morning on Sunday.

Church was interesting today... I remembered again that while I love Saint Mike's, we do have some fairly fundamental differences of theology including the sacraments of eucharist and baptism. It's still a great place to be and I'll continue on there until such time as the Lord prompts me on to elsewhere.

Oh... and because you've been feeling neglected on my links, here's a good news story and here's what you've been waiting for...

Disturbed Link of the Day: Public Company of Interest

2003-10-30T13:20:00.000-06:00

Wow... that attempt to cleanse my soul yesterday felt very good. And then I began to return to my nirvana and become one with the cynicism again. It feels really good. And thus...

Disturbed Link of the Day: The Fysche Bowl - Go and "Learn to write the Lingo-go"

2003-10-30T11:58:00.000-06:00

And I honestly tried to link up Aaron last night... but the people at Blogger had other plans. But now, after the delay... we're back.

2003-10-29T21:01:00.000-06:00

You know... I've been bumming around lately and feeling lethargic and just apathetic as though something was missing from my life. And then I remembered that I had been negligent in the disturbing of the masses and thus depriving myself and others of the benefits of my altruism. So here now, I bring the disturbance.

Disturbed Link of the Day: The Temple of Shao'Kehn (translation: Got warped, home-made half-baked religion? ...because we sure do!)

2003-10-27T21:13:00.000-06:00

My man beat the charges! I am so happy I could do a jig.

2003-10-27T00:24:00.000-06:00

I want one of these. People are already worried about them and there is talk of upgrading systems to lock out some of the cheaper one. Here's an article about the whole situation.

2003-10-26T01:46:00.000-06:00

S*P always has these great ideas:

2003-10-25T18:13:00.000-05:00

Because I'm a speed-reading nut and because I have to one-up others,

I read at 2719 wpm with an accuracy of 91%

Try it out yourself...

2003-10-24T22:19:00.000-05:00

Every now and again, I get afraid that my cynicism may leave me. After all, with every passing day, I intentionally shelter myself more from the idiotic public and spend more time with intelligent individuals. And this may last for a day or a week or even a month... but then I get out and I remember what the world is really like. And it's this kind of stuff that reminds me that I will always be a cynic and a firm believer that humanity is nothing more than a pile of hopeless morons.

One wonderful excerpt:

"I worked at the front desk of a hotel for about two years. It was at a major ski resort in the Rocky Mountains, destination of stupid tourists. "

Dumb Guest #1: "Can you tell me which of these mountains is the Rocky Mountains?"

Dumb Guest #2 (calling from room): "What time is it?"
Me: "8:30."
Dumb Guest #2 "Is that Colorado time?"
(I actually laughed in the phone, wondering why in the world I would give her the time for another time zone).

Dumb Guest #3 (calling to get room rates): "How much would a room with a queen bed be?"
Me: "$69.95 plus tax"
Dumb Guest #3: "Is that in American dollars?"
ME (well, I didn't actually say this, but i thought it): "No, that's 69.95 in Yen. If you want the conversion into American dollars you'll have to call someone who doesn't think you're an idiot."

Dumb Guest #4 (team captain for a European Men's Ski team): "Someone stole my skis."
Me: "Someone stole your skis? Were they in your room?"
Dumb Guest #4: "No, they were right outside the door."
Me: "You left your skis in the hallway?"
Dumb Guest #4: "No, outside the front door of the hotel. They where there last night, but I went outside this morning and they're gone."

And last but not least:

Dumb Guest #5: "Could you tell me how much the complimentary breakfast costs?"

2003-10-23T14:08:00.000-05:00

Mmmm.... everyone loves Jack Chick tracts. Here's my favorite one... ala MST3K. Here's another good Chick tract (no MST3K, sorry) on rock and roll.

If you're in the market for a t-shirt, this one ought to suit most of my friends.

And here's one of the best prank ideas ever...

2003-10-22T14:45:00.000-05:00

There are lots of morons who should be shot... and their idiot lawyers with them. Here is a tale of one such set of morons. I feel their pain, but this is ridiculous. How about we not blame the video game makers and instead sue the defective parents?

If you are amused that people are sick and screwed up... check this site out. And for good measure, here's a man who got battered by his wife. Husband abuse!

2003-10-22T00:07:00.000-05:00

Well... after trying to find someone to go get Toad in Dallas and failing... I did it myself. Fortunately, I brought good company for the drive and even when I took a wrong turn and got lost, she managed to make things better. Damn, wenches are handy.

Also, Gallagher has passed the threshold for posts to be included on the links list... not to mention having posted a rather interesting church review of his home church in Sherman, TX. Guess that's one less church I have to visit... and one more little hell-hole town in Texas to stay away from.

2003-10-19T15:40:00.000-05:00

Arguably the pivoting point of my entire philosophy and eschatology and everything that I am, summed up right here.

2003-10-19T15:09:00.000-05:00

I usually don't post stuff that is this long, but it's amusing and I don't like the fact that the comic is overlapping on the side:

Two Cows

DEMOCRAT
You have two cows.
Your neighbor has none.
You feel guilty for being successful. Barbara Streisand sings for you.

REPUBLICAN
You have two cows.
Your neighbor has none.
So?

SOCIALIST You have two cows.
The government takes one and gives it to your neighbor.
You form a cooperative to tell him how to manage his cow.

COMMUNIST
You have two cows.
The government seizes both and provides you with milk.
You wait in line for hours to get it.
It is expensive and sour.

CAPITALISM, AMERICAN STYLE
You have two cows.
You sell one, buy a bull, and build a herd of cows.

DEMOCRACY, AMERICAN STYLE
You have two cows.
The government taxes you to the point you have to sell both to support a man in a foreign country who has only one cow, which was a gift from your government.

BUREAUCRACY, AMERICAN STYLE
You have two cows.
The government takes them both, shoots one, milks the other, pays you for the milk, and then pours the milk down the drain.

AMERICAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You sell one, lease it back to yourself and do an IPO on the 2nd one.
You force the two cows to produce the milk of four cows.
You are surprised when one cow drops dead.
You spin an announcement to the analysts stating you have down sized and are reducing expenses.
Your stock goes up.

FRENCH CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You go on strike because you want three cows.
You go to lunch and drink wine.
Life is good.

JAPANESE CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You redesign them so they are one tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk.
They learn to travel on unbelievably crowded trains.
Most are at the top of their class at cow school.

GERMAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You engineer them so they are all blond, drink lots of beer, give excellent quality milk, and run a hundred miles an hour.
Unfortunately they also demand 13 weeks of vacation per year.

ITALIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows but you don`t know where they are.
While ambling around, you see a beautiful woman.
You break for lunch.
Life is good.

RUSSIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You have some vodka.
You count them and learn you have five cows.
You have some more vodka.
You count them again and learn you have 42 cows.
The Mafia shows up and takes over however many cows you really have.

TALIBAN CORPORATION
You have all the cows in Afghanistan, which are two.
You don`t milk them because you cannot touch any creature`s private parts.
Then you kill them and claim a US bomb blew them up while they were in the hospital.

IRAQI CORPORATION
You have two cows.
They go into hiding.
They send radio tapes of their mooing.

POLISH CORPORATION
You have two bulls.
Employees are regularly maimed and killed attempting to milk them.

FLORIDA CORPORATION
You have a black cow and a brown cow.
Everyone votes for the best looking one.
Some of the people who like the brown one best, vote for the black one.
Some people vote for both.
Some people vote for neither.
Some people can`t figure out how to vote at all.
Finally, a bunch of guys from out-of-state tell you which is the best looking cow.

CALIFORNIAN
You have a cow and a bull.
The bull is depressed.
It has spent its life living a lie.
It goes away for two weeks.
It comes back after a taxpayer-paid sex-change operation.
You now have two cows.
One makes milk; the other doesn`t.
You try to sell the transgender cow.
Its lawyer sues you for discrimination.
You lose in court.
You sell the milk-generating cow to pay the damages.
You now have one rich, transgender, non-milk-producing cow.
You change your business to beef. PETA pickets your farm.
Jesse Jackson makes a speech in your driveway.
Cruz Bustamante calls for higher farm taxes to help "working cows".
Hillary Clinton calls for the nationalization of 1/7 of your farm "for the children".
Gray Davis signs a law giving your farm to Mexico.
The L.A. Times quotes five anonymous cows claiming you groped their teats.
You declare bankruptcy and shut down all operations.
The cow starves to death.
The L.A. Times` analysis shows your business failure is Bush`s fault.

2003-10-19T15:04:00.000-05:00

Yesterday was a good day... a very good day. In case you ever doubted, I am the king of corruption. Give me money and power and I will corrupt people and organizations to do my bidding so that I get more money and more power. Just ask Wheeler, I am a ruthless monopolist... Carnegie and JP Morgan have nothing on me. I raked everyone else over the coals and bankrupted compe titors and monopolists alike to emerge the owner of the world of Anti-Monopoly.

Oh yeah, and I also bore a bit of witness to a fairly mean game of Risk and played a bit of poker... not to mention taking a nice long walk with my favorite girl... yeah it was a good day. The only real downside was that I didn't get to play D&D and in honor of that, here's a nerdy cartoon in that vein:

2003-10-18T12:42:00.000-05:00

Mmmm.... fall break. Now the million-dollar question is what to do over said break. Obviously, I will be wanting to spend copious amounts of time with The Wench, and some of this will also be spent with those who didn't skip town on me (also including some of the Gallery who don't have blogs and the infamous Martinez.)

There is always the question of what to do in said time... but right now that seems a bit too complicated. After being up for 10 minutes, I think I'll just go back to bed for a while. That seems a bit simpler and more straight-forward.

2003-10-18T03:45:00.000-05:00

Well... I made it to the weekend. The blissful break weekend. And I'm tired and feeling a tad sick. I'll be going to bed now.

Consecutive Software Systems Classes the Cynic has Dismissed : 3
Cynic's Chapel Credit Count: 28

2003-10-15T17:14:00.000-05:00

Wow... this guy hates life. Wouldn't you love it if media assholes published your name and picture on the internet? Especially in a rabid city like Chicago.

2003-10-15T01:46:00.000-05:00

And I think to myself, "Damn, why did I come to class today?" and even as I do that I already know the answer, "attendance policy." The miserable thing about undergraduate study in this sort of environment is that going to class is always a crapshoot. Especially in Software Systems, where you never know if attendance will be taken, if group meetings will be called, or if important assignment-critical information will be distributed. Odds are good that none of these will happen, but by the same token, if a student does miss on one of those critical dates, a volatile explosion on the part of Dr. Varnell is all but ensured and you'll either have to mollify him or take it in the shorts on your grade. And yes, today would be the second day in a row that I've dismissed software systems myself.

And while you're at it, check out this wonderful news post.

Consecutive Software Systems Classes the Cynic has Dismissed : 2
Cynic's Chapel Credit Count: 26

2003-10-14T01:54:00.000-05:00

Updated 15 Oct 2003 2:00 CST

Thank you all for your kind weapons donations. I am now the owner of 10 WMD's and hope to receive more. Thus far I have been gifted with:

Fear Gas Bomb
Donated by A Dark Shadow

Neutron Bomb
Donated by Mad Scientist

mass to energy conversion bombs
Donated by A Librarian

Sunshine supercannon
Donated by Doug

Sunshine Cannon
Donated by Anna

Bombs. Lots and lots of bombs.
Donated by Ross

nuclear fusion devices
Donated by Jon M. Sharpton

Instant Pun Generator
Donated by heh heh heh...

Flesh-Eating Bacteria
Donated by A Concerned Citizen

Hydrogen Bombs
Donated by Blame Jared

The African children will be very pleased by your generousity.

2003-10-13T15:13:00.000-05:00

*shoulders sag*

...so very, very tired... and I don't have the slightest clue why. Maybe it's just that I keep bottling up mental stress and putting it off to deal with a bit later and when I'm swamped with work on Mondays, it all comes crashing down. Or maybe I should just get a bit more sleep... hard to say.

*smacks self awake

On with the program...

Well, that chapel today was all kinds of special. Memo to people who disagree with chapel speakers: the proper way to voice your displeasure is NOT to stand up in the middle of chapel and say so. Even if the speaker is dead wrong and spouting heresy, you just won't get anywhere like that. However, in that vein, I figured it would be pertinent to share that my Mormon name is Johoshua Chevrollette, in case you were wondering.

I would also like to take this chance to thank Jared for pointing me in the right direction to find the little gem on the right (duplicated below):

Please find it in your heart to donate. The poor starving African children will thank you.

2003-10-12T17:38:00.000-05:00

You know, on one hand it is really great to be back at school and be able to grind out all of the good conversation that I missed out on over the summer, but on the other hand, the writing of the combined LU Blogdom has taken a marked turn for the worse since the beginning of the school year. We all write much better when we don't have homework and friends sapping our time and brainpower.